Nadav Spiegelman

We Both Laughed in Pleasure

Lou Sullivan, Ellis Martin, Zach Ozma, and Susan Stryker
My last highlight
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My Highlights

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’ AIDS: The Ultimate Challenge
Told him I’m not talking bout gory details but I would like him to know…I have been seeing another guy for a couple of weeks… He got real taken back said real fast “OK!!!” He started squirming in his seat I said he didn’t have to be freaked out about it he said real sharp “All right!! You don’t have to tell me all about it!!”
Another gay I see a lot is real nice came over to me said “If I was ever going to… if I ever did… if I ever went straight I’d turn queer for you!” I hugged him told him “well put.”
Whenever I’m alone (i.e., without a boyfriend) my crossdressing becomes more serious constant. In my search for the perfect male companion, I find myself. In my need for a man in my bed, I detach myself from my body and my body becomes his; I stroke his hair, I see his wrist. I feel the warm winds blowing my open shirt from my smooth, hard, flat chest. I catch the hungry eyes of another beautiful youngman.
Last night I did my bi weekly testosterone shot and T walked in my room. Later when I joined him he was asking why I keep “poking” myself when I know he doesn’t like it. I answered, “Don’t even tease me about it,” letting him know we’ve gone through this already. He said he wasn’t teasing, that it made him mad. I finally said, “Let’s put it this way: I’d rather lose you than stop my shots.” “You mean that chemical is more important to you than I am?” “No, I am more important to me than you are.”
All 60 close-up facial photos Jim Wigler took of men (and 2 women) diagnosed with AIDS were on display in the San Mateo County Hall of Justice will be [for another month]. He had black ribbons on 5 of them and it took me a while to realize that meant they were already dead.
Surely AIDS is one of the only diseases cloaked in all this philosophizing moralizing about why it exists.
It was from Alyn that I got the phrase “Yours in liberation,” the closure I often use when signing off letters.
I’ve always felt that when doctors come across something they don’t know what it is, they call it “cancer.”