Rejection

My 4 highlights

• At last, he’s found men willing to declare unapologetically that narrow-shouldered feminist men are in truth the most oppressed subaltern group, excluded from both male privilege and female solidarity, a marginalization far worse than those based in race or gender, which were mere constructs, as opposed to the material fact of narrow shoulders.

• It galls her to have to be so involved in all her cousins’ and coworkers’ and college RAs’ weddings; her life feels like a never-ending search for eggshell or mushroom dresses. Every toast she has to write, and gift to register, and plane ticket to book, and male stripper to hire, and escape room to solve, and manicure to schedule, and stylist to suffer through, and group photo to mug for, and self-written vow to applaud; every baby to shower, and onesie to knit, and birthday magician to tip, and baptism to pretend to take seriously—each weathers away a thin unreclaimable layer from the enamel of her patience

• Bringing deviled eggs to house parties. Dressing as Judith Butler for Halloween. Parenting succulents. Pickling garlic scapes. Learning the accordion. Neon green bandanas and a nose stud and a Chelsea cut.

• As soon as the kids acquire language, we’ll start them on an curriculum focused on bizdev and Stoic thought that will give them a massive edge on public-schoolers—picture everyone happily sweating away at their custom desks/treadmills as they absorb meticulously curated high-quality podcasts at 2.5x speed.